


this hole in my heart is proof of life

by Satanisalwayscreaming



Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: But I wanted this for a writing exercise because I have forgotten how to write, Cheating, Gen, Good anime that thing is, I should be asleep HAHAHAHA, I'd be willing to write the nsfw for a 2nd chapter if ever asked owo, Infidelity, M/M, Other, Please know do not EVER cheat with your partners, also the title comes from a lyric 'Is' it's from Zankyou no terror, and untolerable, ngl, or partner, really more of a drabble, some flangst?, that shit is just rude
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-19
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:14:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26550466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Satanisalwayscreaming/pseuds/Satanisalwayscreaming
Summary: "The day comes and Elliot finds himself alone, waking up in his cottage barely clothed, missing someone touching him, the scent of the sea tickling his nose. A sense of longing mixed with hate, rage, guilt over such a callous and unforgivable act. Yet he finds himself missing it, his body sore and needing more."
Relationships: Elliot/Willy (Stardew Valley), Elliott/Player (Stardew Valley)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 11





	this hole in my heart is proof of life

**Author's Note:**

> Hiiiiiiii~
> 
> So I'm writing this for fun exercise because I need to practice writing. Comment what you think about it and any suggestions! I might make this into a series for ALL Stardew Bachelors/Bachelorettes and shake it up. There's no specific gender because maybe y'all wanna project on it? Anyway, comment below also if you want a 2nd NSFW chapter to follow up if ever

_“I love you,”_  
  
The words are true, the only truth he knows completely. He loves you, he loves you with every beat of his heart. The world had been dull, stories, and shapes he couldn’t make sense of. But you were the muse he needed, the gentle beam of sunlight that illuminates his existence.  
  
You are the reason why he lives.  
  
Every breath he takes, it feels like it’s made easier with knowing you’re in his life. The ache that claws in the emptiness of his soul seem to smooth over. You are the angel that has been sent to bless him. Perfect, kind, sweet, and so many more words that if he dared list them all he was afraid he’d never stop talking.  
  
But that’s what you are, perfect.  
  
Elliot feels like a sinner, holding hands calloused and worn but did _honest_ and steady work. The farm like a temple, as if no darkness could touch it. A holy land that graces those who tread on it and a place of refuge for the hurting. You were like the deity in a world that has long cried out for salvation.  
  
Yet Elliot knows that he is damned.  
  
You are his salvation, but he keeps drowning. The pain in his heart doesn’t fade, there’s an emptiness, a yearning he had thought would vanish when you had married, thinking that it would fade away. That the hole in his heart would fade away and he could settle down, be at peace.  
  
Peace does not find him, only hunger, longing.   
  
Days where you would toil and work hard, he would busy himself on the farm. Fixing fences, cooking food, he finds himself both immersed in this life and somehow so detached. As if he wanted so much more, just a little more experience for the novels he was writing.  
  
And he got his wish.  
  
He got it by drinking, by being tipsy, and being brought back to his beachside cabin. His wish granted when another set of calloused hands help him and he finds himself pulling, desperate, hungry for a change. Mind buzzing as he pulls, as if trying to convince the man with the brightest, bluest eyes he’s seen to reciprocate, to respond.  
  
Willy does.  
  
Elliot doesn’t remember much of that night. But he remembers the bed creaking, his arms wrapped tightly around the angler. His eyes closed, his breath short, the pain in his heart intensifying, a pang of guilt coiling in his stomach. Yet thrill spikes with it, a thrill that tastes like danger, an adventure that makes him clench harder and makes him edge Willy on.  
  
Perhaps this was the adventure he needed.  
  
The day comes and Elliot finds himself alone, waking up in his cottage barely clothed, missing someone touching him, the scent of the sea tickling his nose. A sense of longing mixed with hate, rage, guilt over such a callous and unforgivable act. Yet he finds himself missing it, his body sore and needing more.  
  
 _For the book_ , he thinks, trying to convince himself.  
  
 _It’s what I need for experience_ , his brain supplies, arguing with the regret and bile that rises in his throat when you come back from the mines all dirty and tired. Smiling so bright and kissing his lips, unaware of the sins on his skin.   
  
More and more he finds you far too perfect, too pure.  
  
Your love saves him, makes him want to do better. Coming home with you felt like a paradise, a long-awaited rest from the tribulations that life has set. But his heart is racing, yearning for the adventure that had happened a night ago. Yearning for the adrenaline, for the secret that could unravel everything you’ve both built.  
  
It makes him feel more alive than he has for years.  
  
So he waits. Making breakfast, helping along with the chores, and he thinks maybe the yearn for adventure was fading. Maybe alcohol had twisted him into a demon, into an unrecognizable monster. Perhaps it will fade away and he can continue this life without ever returning to his mistake. Yet his mind taunts him, your touches reminding him of _his_ , touches.

Sometimes late at night, when you had gone to bed or perhaps haven't returned from the mines, he finds himself thinking of someone else, finding joy in the thought of eyes, so much bluer than the sky. 

He loves you, he knows he does. Elliot finds the world all the brighter with you by his side. But he yearns for the adventure, for the idea. You are the deity he dedicates his soul to but he finds himself led away into temptation. It doesn't help when he takes walks by the beach he sees the familiar silhouette of his dear friend...

"This is wrong," Willy had said once after Elliot had snuck in once more into the shop. There were only 2 people who swung by, Elliot's partner and Elliot himself. But the frequency of the visits tells Willy who it was, approaching his door. "You shouldn't hurt yer partner like this."

"I know," Elliot says, his words are emboldened, as if he had drank before meeting him. "But I can't stop...I want to--I'm trying to but..." He trails off, unable to find the words to adequately describe the burning need that seems to consume him. No amount of pleading or words could convey what he feels. "I need you."

"Elliot," Willy replies. "I ain't comfortable with this..."

"Please..."

And Elliot knows he's damned--he knows he's consigned himself to this fate. He knows it isn't fair to ask Willy to join him, but maybe Willy wants to play with fire because instead of replying he crosses the distance and pulls Elliot in a smoldering kiss. With Elliot whimpering and falling into his touch. Relief floods him and he feels perfect, complete. 

As if the ache in his heart is finally being appeased.

After a few weeks, you say you need to leave, having to encourage the trading, between Oasis, in Zuzu city. You entrust the farm with him, entrust your heart in his hands. He promises to take care of it, to tend to what you leave behind and you trust him. You trust him with your life.  
  
Not knowing that as soon as you leave, he’s heading down to the beach, into a familiar fishing shop, locking the door behind him.


End file.
